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Friday, July 8, 2016

Socialist Hell Versus Capitalist Hell

A man dies and goes to hell. He finds himself at a lobby where there are two doors, above one door a sign hangs, it reads "Socialist Hell". Above the second door a sign hangs reading "Capitalist Hell".

The man notices a long line of people snaking towards the entrance of Socialist Hell, but nobody is in line at all for Capitalist Hell. The man decides to find out why and visits the guard of Capitalist Hell.

"So, what goes on here?"

"Well, first we fillet your skin and throw salt all over your raw flesh and stitch you back up. Then, we shove hot coals in every orifice you have. Finally, we throw you in a pit of fire to writhe in agony for all eternity."

"Holy Hell! Thats terrible! Im going to go check out Socialist Hell !"

"Ok"

The man stands in line for Socialist Hell but soon grows impatient and soon just cuts the line and goes up to the guard: "So, what goes on in here"

"Well, first we fillet your skin and throw salt over your raw flesh and stitch you back up. Then, we shove hot coals in every orifice you have. Finally, we throw you into a pit of fire to writhe in agony for all of eternity"

"What the hell! Thats the exact same thing as Capitalist Hell, why is there no line for there but a huge line for here?"

"Well, sometimes we dont have salt, and sometimes we dont have any coal, and sometimes we have no fire at all!"

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